I received an interesting bit of SPAM today and thought it might be fun to see where it goes. Here for your amusement (or at least mine) is the communication. My commentary is in [square brackets] and was not part of the email thread. His emails are in bold, mine are plain. I am leaving his email intact for spam crawlers and if any readers want to mess with him.
===============================================================
-----Original Message-----
From: Barrister Adams Coulibaly [mailto:diplomatichenrry@gmail.com]
Sent: Tuesday, June 28, 2016 4:32 PM
Subject: Hello
Good Morning
I have decided to contact you due to the urgency arising in this matter, I am Hon.Barrister Adams Coulibaly, a solicitor at law. My late client was bearing a last name with you , who was a popularly known independent contractor here in Lome Togo.On 21 April 2008,he and his wife and only daughter were involved in an automobile accident while visiting a neighboring country on vacation. I contacted you to assist me in repatriating the fund valued of (US$13.5 million) into your account. Furthermore, in this transaction i want you confidentially reply to me directly for more details.
Contact me direct to my privet email for security resin ( acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com Thank you, Barrister Adams Coulibaly
===============================================================
From: Peter
Date: Tue, Jun 28, 2016 at 4:41 PM
Subject: RE: Hello
To: acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com
Dear Barrister Adams Coulibaly,
I received your urgent email and wanted to respond immediately. Given the confidential nature of the email I am sending from a different email account. I hope that's ok. I am saddened to hear about the death of my relative. I want to assist you but I have no idea what I can do to help.
Please let me know as soon as you can.
[I intentionally did not follow up to see what he'd do next]
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Jul 1, 2016 at 3:44 AM
Subject: Hello Mr Peter
To: Peter
Hello Mr Peter
How are you today with your family, what is going on, i have send you
massage more Dan 3 times know respond i hope all is well. All the
information i want from you o that will can start the arrangement you
know talk to me again are you not interesting any more
Thanks and urgent respond
Barrister Adams
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Fri, Jul 1, 2016 at 6:55 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista Adams,
I am so happy you wrote back. I lost your previous email and I thought I'd lost out on this opportunity. Poor Uncle Victor! I know he would want me to have this money.
Attached is the information you requested. [I attached nothing] I am anxiously waiting your response.
P.S. Do you enjoy the smell of coffee when you're making it? [Note, I addressed him as Barista]
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Jul 1, 2016 at 10:31 AM
Subject: Hello Mr Peter
To: Peter
Dear Mr Peter Eisengrein,
This is the information i want from you [Clearly he is all business]
Thanks for your response, my client Engr.Victor Eisengrein, died on 21
April 2008 with his family members without any registered next of kin
and the funds now have an open beneficiary mandate, he had no
registered next of kin and as such the bank has notified me to present
the relatives or have the funds confiscated, having searched for his
relatives without finding anyone alive, I decided to contact you
before the bank confiscates the money. However you need to furnish to
me with the following information.
1. Your full name
2.Home or office Address
3.Your private phone number
4. Marital status
5.Age & Nationality
6.Profession
7. A scanned copy of your Identity card or passport
.
With your forwarded information, I shall be going to the Registry of
the Togolese High Court to procure the per-requisite legal documents
and an Affidavit of claim in your favor as the next of kin to the late
depositor. This affidavit of claim is a legal paper work that will
confer on you, the statutory right to lay this claim. Upon the
procurement of the affidavit, I shall proceed to the bank and submit
every necessary document to the legal department to put claims for the
transfer of the said fund to your account. Once I file this
application,
Thanks
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Fri, Jul 1, 2016 at 12:34 PM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista,
I'm so sorry. You didn't get the info I sent the first time? I am re-attaching for you. [I still attached nothing]
Do you serve scones with your coffee?
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Date: Fri, Jul 1, 2016 at 3:56 PM
Subject: Hello Mr Peter
To: Peter
Hello
Please i know receive the information send it again ok
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Sat, Jul 2, 2016 at 7:53 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista Coulibaly,
I am happy that it went through that time and you know you receive the information. When will I receive the money? [I purposefully misinterpreted his response and totally ignored his request to "send it again ok"]
After the money is received I would like to get together with you and have some coffee. Maybe cappuccino? Do you like cappuccino? I bet you do. I bet you like cappuccino. I have a friend named Adam (no "s") and he LOVES cappuccino, but not with cinnamon on top. Can you believe that? He likes it plain. I always thought that the cinnamon was an important part of the cappuccino experience. My friend Adam drinks plain cappuccino every day. I bet you like cappuccino. I mean, how could you resist when you smell it all day. I'd want to drink cappuccino all day. I'd drink cappuccino with a scone every day if I were you. [Yum. I love cappuccino!]
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Mon, Jul 4, 2016 at 10:25 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista,
Do you think we'll get the money today? I know you said it would take several days but I was hoping it would come today. Today would be great, don't you think?
I've been thinking what I would do with over $6,000,000 dollars! Maybe we should go into business together. If we combine my 6 million with your 6 million we'd have 12 million (I'm very excellent at math) then we could do something really big. Don't you think? Don't you think we could do big things with 12 million dollars? I was thinking maybe we could go into business doing imports of -- you're going to love this -- coffee beans! We could start a premier coffee business.
Please let me know when you think we'll get the money and we can start our coffee business. Maybe we can call it Victor's Coffee, named after good old Uncle Victor.
This is going to be great!
From: Peter
Date: Mon, Jul 4, 2016 at 10:25 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista,
Do you think we'll get the money today? I know you said it would take several days but I was hoping it would come today. Today would be great, don't you think?
I've been thinking what I would do with over $6,000,000 dollars! Maybe we should go into business together. If we combine my 6 million with your 6 million we'd have 12 million (I'm very excellent at math) then we could do something really big. Don't you think? Don't you think we could do big things with 12 million dollars? I was thinking maybe we could go into business doing imports of -- you're going to love this -- coffee beans! We could start a premier coffee business.
Please let me know when you think we'll get the money and we can start our coffee business. Maybe we can call it Victor's Coffee, named after good old Uncle Victor.
This is going to be great!
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Mon, Jul 4, 2016 at 11:10 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista,
I talked to my friend Adam. You remember, I mentioned Adam. He's the one who doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino (can you believe that?!). Anyway, I told him about the coffee import business we're going to start and he would like to partner with us. He doesn't have 6 million dollars to put into the business but he does have 17 dollars and a nice watch that he is willing to invest. [nod to Planes Trains and Automobiles]
Please let me know what you think about having Adam as a business partner. I told him you'd almost certainly be willing to have him since his name is Adam and your name is Adams. It's like it is meant to be.
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Peter
Date: Mon, Jul 4, 2016 at 3:36 PM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Barista,
I talked to my friend Adam again about our business venture. You remember Adam. He's the one who doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. Crazy. Anyway, we discussed the coffee import business we're starting and he had a great idea. Brilliant even. He suggested that we not only import coffee but we also import sugar. And then he even suggested that we start a dairy farm. What a crazy smart idea? Don't you think?
Anyway, I'm really excited about our future business venture!
I look forward to hearing from you soon!!!!!!!
===============================================================
---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com>
Date: Tue, Jul 5, 2016 at 6:10 AM
Subject: Re: Hello Mr Peter
To: Peter
ok so what is your dissipation
[Wait. What? Touche' Mr. Coulibaly. I did not see this one coming. My response will require some thought.]
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Mon, Jul 11, 2016 at 11:05 AM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter | ||
Barista Coulibaly,
Sorry I have been slow to respond. I have been very, very busy. My friend, Ferris, was in town for a parade and we spent a lot of time doing so many things. Unlike Adam, Ferris likes cinnamon on his cappuccino. You remember my friend, Adam, right? He's the weirdo that doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. Well, Ferris is not like that, Ferris drinks his cappuccino like a normal person.
Ferris has also been helping me search for warehouse space for our business (gotta have a place for all those beans!) and start getting all the other things in place for the business. So exciting!
Oh, and to answer your question, my dissipation is collecting antique coffee pots.
===============================================================
===============================================================
Sorry I have been slow to respond. I have been very, very busy. My friend, Ferris, was in town for a parade and we spent a lot of time doing so many things. Unlike Adam, Ferris likes cinnamon on his cappuccino. You remember my friend, Adam, right? He's the weirdo that doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. Well, Ferris is not like that, Ferris drinks his cappuccino like a normal person.
Ferris has also been helping me search for warehouse space for our business (gotta have a place for all those beans!) and start getting all the other things in place for the business. So exciting!
Oh, and to answer your question, my dissipation is collecting antique coffee pots.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Fri, Jul 15, 2016 at 10:03 PM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter Barista, I am disappointed in you. I thought you were a smart businessman. I accept your silence to mean you do not want to go into business with Adam, Ferris, and me. You'll regret it when we build our multi-billion dollar global coffee bean and dairy farm empire! I wish I could see your face when you realize what you chose to not participate in. Ferris and I, however, will be smiling a huge smile with cinnamon-speckled frothy lips (made from my antique cappuccino machine, of course). Adam will have frothy lips from the antique cappuccino machine too, they just won't be cinnamon speckled. I told you about my friend, Adam, right? He's the weird guy that doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. Anyway, please send me the money you promised so that I can get Victor's Coffee bean empire going. I've gotten a warehouse and am currently waiting for the first shipment of beans to arrive from Greenland. Oh, and I bought a cow too. See you latte! (See what I did there?) [Yes, I had just watched Ferris Beuhler] |
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Fri, Jul 15, 2016 at 10:16 PM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
One other thing... Dairy farming is harder than I thought it would be. The man sold me a "special" dairy cow. She has big horns and a single, large udder. She only gives about a half cup of milk and it tastes funny. [Ew] I expected a bucket full.
I'll keep trying.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sat, Jul 16, 2016 at 8:40 AM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
It has been over 9 hours since I emailed you and I still have received the money you promised me.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sat, Jul 16, 2016 at 8:40 AM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
I hope my coffee beans arrive today.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:09 AM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
Barista,
It's been a whole day since I emailed you. I just checked to see if the money you promised had arrived yet and, like cinnamon on Adam's cappuccino, nothing is there.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:20 AM [11 minutes later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
While I wait for the money you promised to arrive I think I'll have a nice cup of cappuccino. I like it frothy with cinnamon on top. You know who doesn't like cinnamon on top? My friend Adam. I told you about him, right? He's that weird friend of mine who doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. No cinnamon. Cappuccino sans cinnamon. Can you believe that?!? That's the strangest thing I've ever heard, no cinnamon on his cappuccino. Do you like cinnamon on your cappuccino, Barista? I bet you do. I bet you like cinnamon on your cappuccino because you're not weird like my friend Adam. I've told you about Adam, right?
Well, my cappuccino is ready! Bring on the cinnamon!
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:23 AM [3 minutes later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
Yuck, this cappuccino tastes awful! I don't understand. I used milk I got from the cow this morning.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:38 AM [5 minutes later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:38 AM [< 60 seconds later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
I just checked again. Still not here.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:39 AM [1 minute later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
And again. Nothing.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 10:45 AM [6 minutes later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
Why is it taking so looooong.
I'll make another cup of cappuccino while I wait.
I'll make another cup of cappuccino while I wait.
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 1:55 PM [A couple hours later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
Still nothing.
At least the second cup of cappuccino was better. I used store bought milk. Stupid cow. And I had biscotti with my cappuccino. Do you like biscotti? I bet you do. I bet you like biscotti, Barista. I bet you love biscotti. You probably eat biscotti every chance you get. I'm a very good judge of character and I can usually tell when someone likes something like biscotti. I bet you love biscotti, don't you, Barista? One weird thing about biscotti, though. Is biscotti a cookie, a cracker, or a biscuit? I can't tell. But I sure do love biscotti with my cappuccino. Don't you, Barista? Don't you love biscotti with your cappuccino?
At least the second cup of cappuccino was better. I used store bought milk. Stupid cow. And I had biscotti with my cappuccino. Do you like biscotti? I bet you do. I bet you like biscotti, Barista. I bet you love biscotti. You probably eat biscotti every chance you get. I'm a very good judge of character and I can usually tell when someone likes something like biscotti. I bet you love biscotti, don't you, Barista? One weird thing about biscotti, though. Is biscotti a cookie, a cracker, or a biscuit? I can't tell. But I sure do love biscotti with my cappuccino. Don't you, Barista? Don't you love biscotti with your cappuccino?
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 2:54 PM [59 minutes later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
I'm stuffed. I ate too many biscotti.
Do you think the money you promised will arrive today? I hope so. I think the coffee beans might arrive tomorrow. How am I going to pay for 4000 pounds of coffee beans if the money is not here?
Do you think the money you promised will arrive today? I hope so. I think the coffee beans might arrive tomorrow. How am I going to pay for 4000 pounds of coffee beans if the money is not here?
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Sun, Jul 17, 2016 at 4:55 PM [2 hours later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
So Barista, you haven't told me much about yourself. It doesn't seem right that we are business partners and I don't know much about you. How did you become a barista? Did you have to go to school for it or did you already know how to make delicious coffee beverages? I bet you already knew. Didn't you, barista, you already knew how to make tasty coffee beverages.
What's your dissipation? [I can play this too]
What's your dissipation? [I can play this too]
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Mon, Jul 18, 2016 at 5:52 AM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
No money yet. No beans yet.
Is cappuccino your dissipation?
Is cappuccino your dissipation?
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Mon, Jul 18, 2016 at 6:25 PM | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
BEANS ARE HERE!!!
Do you have any idea how many coffee beans are are in 4000 pounds? Exactly 17,023,771 (I counted)
Wow!
Do you have any idea how many coffee beans are are in 4000 pounds? Exactly 17,023,771 (I counted)
Wow!
===============================================================
| from: | Adams Coulibaly acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com | ||
| to: | Peter | ||
| date: | Thu, Jul 21, 2016 at 9:14 PM | ||
| subject: | Hello Mr Peter |
Hello My Friend
How are you today, please can i have your number to call you [I don't think so]
===============================================================
| from: | Peter | ||
| to: | Adams Coulibaly <acabinetcoulibaly@gmail.com> | ||
| date: | Mon, May 29, 2017 at 7:57 PM [10 months later] | ||
| subject: | Re: Hello Mr Peter |
Dear Barista,
I am so sorry that I haven't responded in a while. It's kind of a long story but I'll try to be brief.
As I'm sure you remember, I had just received shipment of 4000 pounds of coffee beans. I originally counted 17,023,771 beans but when I recounted I got 17,023,769, 17,023,772, and 17,023,782. [Who would count them at all, but FOUR times?] Bonus beans! Anyway, I got the beans, and I had that cow, which I've named Holmes (after the famous actor Johnny Holmes). And my friends Ferris and Adam -- you remember Adam, right? He's the weird one that doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. I mean, COME ON! Who doesn't love cinnamon on their cappuccino? No one, that's who! I bet you like cinnamon on your cappuccino, don't you Barista? Don't you love cinnamon on your cappuccino, Barista? I bet you do. Anyway, Ferris, and Adam, and I were ready to go into business but you never sent the money like you promised. I'm sure it got lost in the mail. So, we didn't have the money but we had a warehouse full of coffee beans that we couldn't pay for. And we had that cow, Holmes, but no money because you never sent the money you promised. And so we went broke. And then I had to shut off my Internet connection, and then the power was shut off. And then I was forced to move out of my apartment. So I lived in the warehouse with the cow and the beans. Did I tell you about the milk from that cow? It was awful.
So one day Ferris and Adam and I were sitting in the dark warehouse drinking cappuccino made from that cow and a man came by and he asked for a cup of cappuccino. Well, we didn't have money but we did have manners and we did have beans, so we gave him a cup. And guess what? Guess, Barista. Well, you guessed it, Barista, the man LOVED it, and we went into business with him. Funny thing is, this man, the one who loved our cappuccino and went into business with us, also doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. W-W-WHAT??? Yes, he is just like my friend Adam who doesn't like cinnamon on his cappuccino. I've told you about my friend Adam, right, Barista, I've told you about Adam?
Long story short, we started with one coffee shop, grew it into 8 stores, and then we sold the whole chain of them.
So with my earnings, I have bought a small herd of single utter cows. I'm broke again, but at least I have milk.
Anyway, Barista, thank you for your friendship. I'm afraid that this will be my last email as my Internet is getting shut off again at the end of this month. But if you want to call me, you can call me at 1-877-382-4357. [The number for reporting scams at the FTC]
[His email is blocked and I will be shutting down the account. Done]
[His email is blocked and I will be shutting down the account. Done]
